My Journey

Early Childhood

I grew up in a Christian family. As a child my Mum and Dad read me all the Bible stories. They taught me to pray and they took me to Sunday school and kid's groups. I spent many years learning about God and about the Bible and getting to know it very well. I also enjoyed reading science journals written with a biblical perspective.

Teenage Years

As a child, I did love the idea of God and it made sense to me, but once I reached my middle teenage years I did become aware of the fact that I knew "about" God but wasn't really sure that I had a real relationship with him myself. From what I had read in the Bible and been taught, and also observed in other people around me, I began to desire an experience of God for myself. I wanted to know that he actually knew who I was and that he cared about me.

One weekend I went on a church youth camp. As part of the camp, there were meetings where leaders would pray for people to receive a revelation from God. This was what I really desired and I went forward for prayer. Some people would instantly feel a touch of God on them, but I didn't really feel very much at all. But I did pray honestly and I did really want to know that God loved me. I wanted to know that God had done something inside me.

After the meeting ended I went outside not really feeling any different. I remember reflecting as I walked out the door and down the steps. I began to wonder about how Jesus must look at me, when suddenly I had a vivid picture in my mind that Jesus was speaking to me and saying "I love you". Suddenly I knew that something had happened. Immediately upon hearing those words, a deep joy and wave of happiness flooded into my heart and I began to laugh out loud. As an introverted person who never wants to draw attention to myself, this was a very strange experience. I would have chosen a nice quiet introspective revelation of God, but I suddenly realised that I didn't care about anything else in the world. The God of the universe loved me. This revelation was so real that it overwhelmed every fear that I had, and I laughed with such a joy that I didn't want to stop.

This experience continued for many hours. Every time I thought about God I would feel a warm presence come upon me and I would just laugh with joy. The next day and the whole following week, I had a feeling in my soul that something was different. There was a presence of God inside of me, and he loved me more than I could comprehend. I remember that day as if it was yesterday, it was such an important revelation to me.

Adulthood

Throughout all the years since that time I have had many similar experiences, perhaps not to the same degree, but many times when I've been in worship at church, or when I've been in a deep personal prayer time, I have felt that same presence in my heart and I recognise that it is the same Jesus that I met that day. These times of revelation of the heart of God have been a precious and important pillar of my faith. I know that God is not just "something out there" but that he knows who I am and that he wants to be with me. This is so much more than just "religion". This is so much more than just following a list of rules, or doing a bunch of activities. This has been the core of my faith ever since.

Answered Prayer

Many times in my life, I have seen answers to my prayers. From that moment when he filled me with his Spirit, to meeting my wife, finding work, having children, finding meaningful friendships, dealing with the anxieties of finance and life in general, every prayer has been answered to this point. I have prayed thousands of prayers for help to understand problems that I needed to solve, or for events to come together. I can sit here now and reflect on how all of those things have come to be. So often, I even forget the prayers I have prayed until even a year or more later when I realise that the thing I prayed for has been solved. I had forgotten that I even prayed and I realise that God has been at work throughout my life, listening to me, providing for me, even when I haven't noticed it.

Understanding the Bible

God has also helped me to understand his word. I have found that as I pray and read the Bible at the same time, and as I submit my mind and my heart and ask him to speak through his scripture, I have found that the Bible speaks from God's heart to my heart on every page. I find echos of that time when he first revealed his love to me. Reading the Bible without this help from the Holy Spirit is much harder, as the words often just seem religious and irrelevant to my "modern" life. But I have grown to love the word of God as I have learnt how to also listen to his Spirit speaking through it.